The usual noise brought her back to present. She wasn’t denying her inability to handle disputes, but all she wanted was to be considered. The regular irksome validating of her feelings towards him had turned her insipid.
She sat on the old and broken high-chair that one of the residents in the building gave away. The watchman wasn’t sure of its utility, so thought of keeping it there in the terrace till he figured out what he could do with it.
Every time she moved a bit, the chair swayed slightly, making her light-headed. Her heart raced thinking about all she was about to do. The busy traffic, blinding lights, honking vehicles, the clattering outside the garbage area of restaurants, indefinite talking of people… all, sort of took her peace of mind; something she wanted so badly at that point of time.
She swallowed hard and took a deep breath. Wiping her tears, she looked down one more time and got down from the chair. It started to drizzle gradually.
She looked around for something to step on; she couldn’t have reached the railing easily. There was a bucket outside the lift room; probably the watchman used it for bathing in the terrace during summers, or maybe that was also given away by someone else. She didn’t think much and grabbed it in a hurry.
Trying to find a perfect place, the only one that seemed favorable was a corner close to the stairs that reached the water tanks. She turned the bucket upside down and placed it on the ground.
The drizzling got heavier but wasn’t a rain yet. Her eyes blinked every time a drop fell on them and it kept them busy in a confusion between her tears and the water.
She stepped on the bucket, raised one leg to stand on the railing. It wasn’t courage enough for that moment. Her fists were tighter and her whole body was shaking, when there was a sudden impact!
She was pulled with a strong force by the arm, misbalancing her on the bucket and making her fall. She let out a scream of shock, only to find her dropping towards open arms!
“What do you think you’re doing?” came a shout.
With her eyes still closed in shock, she cried, “let me die! PLEASE!” and tried to move away.
For a second of getting her back to her senses, she was slapped pretty hard, followed by a huge hug and cry.
It was the same hug she ever wanted. The same feeling of belongingness and the same care.
She opened her eyes to see him standing right in front of her with tears clearly showing-off even in the drizzle. They hugged once again.
From the corners of her eye, she looked down again… the traffic never stopped, honking got louder, the clattering remained the same and people didn’t stop talking. Everything was the same… nothing had changed, really.